I got your name from Blank department web site. My son, Blankity Blank is a junior at Blank. He is registered for Blank 101 Lecture and LAB in the Fall 2009 semester.
Blankity would benefit from formal one-on-one tutoring for about 2 to 3 times a week. I was wondering if you would be available. If so, please let me know as soon as possible and what the fee would be. I am writing this email on Blankity's behalf as he is working long hours.
Mommy Blank (Blankity's mother)
I'm not sure which I find more ridiculous. The fact that she wrote the e-mail for him or the fact that she thinks he needs tutoring 2-3 times a week in any course, let alone Blank 101. If her kid does need the intense hand holding of tutoring 2-3 times a week perhaps he should reconsider an academic career of any sort.