I haven't gone to sleep later than 11 o'clock in the past three days.
Yesterday I tucked myself into bed before 10.
Tonight, it's 10:20.
And I'm still tired.
I came back to Berkeley tonight knowing there would be no reason to stay up late tonight, but hoping anyways. But sleep is pretty much the only thing that appeals anymore. These days it's the only time I'm 100% there.
But even it is a fickle lover and I wake up alone at 2 am, 6 am, tangled in my pajamas, bed sheets, soaked in sweat and panicked. I repeat the multiplication tables to myself until finally drift off again.
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I remember reading about how in certain parts of Asia and in Macedonia, people use cormorants to catch fish.
The fisherman uses a ring or tie on the bird's neck so it won't be able to swallow the fish it catches.
Every seventh fish the fisherman has to give to the cormorant or else the bird will stop fishing.
And if I remember correctly, after a few years, the cormorant won't fish for the fisherman any more.
The cormorant would rather starve than lose all but the seventh fish.
Except maybe that last part isn't true.
The fisherman uses a ring or tie on the bird's neck so it won't be able to swallow the fish it catches.
Every seventh fish the fisherman has to give to the cormorant or else the bird will stop fishing.
And if I remember correctly, after a few years, the cormorant won't fish for the fisherman any more.
The cormorant would rather starve than lose all but the seventh fish.
Except maybe that last part isn't true.
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